We all have a story in our lives. There was a moment, usually in our youth, that the growth process halted. It may be difficult to recall the exact circumstance or situation of epiphany, but we wrote it down as a lesson in our book and every page sine then has been a continuation of that story.

Not Pretty Enough? Nobodies Favorite? In my case, Misunderstood. All just stories - a highly impressionable, sensitive young mind's reaction to a perceived situation. A reaction to a perception. How's that for subjective? Yet we accepted it as reality. And as adults, here we are trying to prove our stories wrong while simultaneously protecting them with all our might. Proving we are Pretty by mastering cosmetic application and the art of flirting and then protecting our Ugliness by picking our pimples into scars. Proving we are Favorites by becoming indispensable in others' lives, then protecting our Invisibility by constantly surveying how they take us for granted. Or proving Connection (bring it on home, Miss Misunderstood) by becoming an adept at instant social intimacy, then protecting Loneliness by disappearing right when we need someone the most.

If you ever recognize a viscous pattern in your life, I bet the paradox of your story is behind it.

It is important to remember that our stories aren't good or bad, they are just what humans, the ultimate meaning makers, do. So forgive yourself right now for creating the story, then forgive yourself for thinking it's bad to have one, then praise yourself for being perfectly human.

And now, realizing the story a subjective system that you are capable of dissolving just as you were capable of creating, ask yourself the only important question left to ask: Is it serving me?

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